tunasub | stop eating grass seto

stop eating grass seto

[ So maybe Shin couldn't actually eat anymore. That was fine and expected; he'd been fully aware of the consequences of assuming a virtual form when he did it. But he could still remember how to cook and the taste of food and certain dishes. Day by day, spending time with the other few people that shared this little spaceship cabin, he was beginning to remember more about what humanity was really like - before Glass Cage and the human empathy project, before he learned about everything. And little by little, he was starting to open back up again. When they'd celebrated his birthday unexpectedly, he'd been pleasantly surprised - a feeling he hadn't had since that night on Tokyo Tower. But, moreover, he wasn't just pleased; he was grateful. That never happened.

Towards Seto, he especially felt gratitude. After all, he already owed him a great deal. Thus, for once, the bitter Shin felt like he ought to do something for someone, and that would be why he's in the kitchen, apparently making noodles. Just udon noodles.

Maybe he wasn't great at it, but he might as well try. ]

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[Seto seems fixated on Shin's face now.]

So does that mean...all those really big books in there were yours?

[ Shin gives him a questioning glance. ]

... What sort of books?

[Many hours were spent staring at the book spines in his grandpa's archive. When he says them out loud, it sounds like something he's memorized, but doesn't fully understand.]

AI Technological Singularity and...Project Glass Cage Execution Summary.

There were a lot there. Those looked like the hardest to read.

... Those are mine.

[ yeah, this is weird. Could it be that he'd made it there and then died? It's not like he'd moved his belongings in there yet when he bought it... ]

Perhaps I died there.

...Huh? Grandpa had your books?

[The moment Shin says the phrase "perhaps I died there" something occurs to him. Time seems to be moving slowly now. There are many things he remembers about Grandpa. Grandpa didn't like to talk much, Grandpa liked to read his books, Grandpa liked udon noodles and things very salty and above all Grandpa liked the stars.

It's weird. Seto spent a great deal of time watching him and Shin held himself the same way, though it was a bit different since he was floating. There was something familiar about him that had bothered him from the moment they met. He pushed it aside.]

...Died there.

[The words come out quiet and he sounds shocked. All at once he's trying to absorb this new information.

Because of all the things he remembered most about his Grandpa, it was burying him at the end of summer and placing his corpse in that grave. Back then he thought he would never see him again once he put the dirt over his body.

Back before he met Shin.]

[Immediately, Seto turns his gaze up to look at Shin. How could he not realize it sooner? There's recognition and tears brimming in his eyes. For the sake of talking, and for keeping his thoughts together, he's trying desperately not to cry. Seto's always been emotional and now is no exception. ]

It was...it was you.

[Despite how much he's trying, he can't stop them from coming out of his eyes.]

Grandpa.

[ The thought hadn't even crossed Shin's mind.

Now he's looking at Seto in shock, or something akin to it - as always, he second-guessed everything until he couldn't believe it anymore. Right now, he was thinking that this couldn't possibly be true. He didn't have the evidence in his memories stacked up like Seto did. All he had was a few weird coincidences and this odd, naive little boy telling him it was so. ]

What are you saying?

[ But his voice isn't cold or condescending - on the contrary, it's full of quiet concern, alarm. Wasn't it too much of a coincidence? Could that be possible? The irony would be hilarious - raising a child that would go back and nearly kill him - no, it was too coincidental, it couldn't be... ]

[Seto realizes how it sounds because even he's still trying to come to terms with it. It's not difficult for him to believe. In fact, it's painfully easy now. There were the nights he spent wishing, wanting that old man to return so he could show him this new amazing place, though a part of him always realized he was dead.

Crow, Shin and Sai always gave him hope. They had died and returned. Now here he was, or rather, had been the entire time.]

That you're right. You did...die there.

I'm saying...I'm saying that I missed you so much. I read your letter every day after you died.

Seto...

[ he... actually looks faintly apologetic, for once. Really, he's still confused. Obviously he knows what Seto means - it's not that. It's that Seto is so very certain about it and shedding tears. And he's just floating there, not sure what to do or if he should believe it. What should he say? Even though Seto had grown up with this man - with him, if this was true - the Shin he was speaking to now had split off from "Grandpa" more than fifteen years ago. He didn't know anything about this.

The scientific approach was all he really knew. ]

How can you be certain?

[That approach doesn't work with him. Grandpa may have raised him, but none of his science savvy way of thinking seemed to have rubbed off. Instead of offering definite proof, all Seto can say is:]

I know it's...you.

[It almost hurts to hear someone he once called Grandpa asking him that. While there may be two different people now, Seto could only see the kind old man that raised him. They didn't talk much, but Seto realizes now how much he loved him.

Hesitantly, he reaches out to grab Shin's hand though it's obvious he wants to do much more. Shin probably didn't like surprise hugs and Seto remembers Grandpa didn't seem too fond of them either. Not that Seto hugged often back then. Only when he was scared or wanted human contact. ]

I know that...you don't remember it. That's okay. I remember all of it. Every moment I spent with you and...it made me so happy. It makes me so happy to be with you again.

[He really can't stop crying now. It should be obvious how important this old man was to Seto.]

I never knew your name so...I never got to thank you, but now I do. Thank you for everything, Shin.

[ It's obvious, all right. This is not the kind of situation someone like Shin should be put into; he was bitter and unkind and anti-social, and his heart was only just beginning to heal. Yet here was this boy, sobbing and holding his hand for things that Shin didn't even remember doing - that he hadn't done yet, he supposed. The boy that he'd supposedly raised from what must have been infancy. Honestly, he has no room to doubt Seto; after all, he's the one with all the information here. He just looks at him, and then to the hand he's holding.

Why did these people keep appearing? He hardly deserved to be thanked for anything or to be the recipient of all these tears. He hadn't deserved Sai's forgiveness or her feelings, either. And yet... here he was and here they were. ]

You... shouldn't thank me for anything. [ He ducks his head, trying to hide whatever his expression is, but, after a moment of hesitation, he takes Seto's hand in return. He feels like he shouldn't. Like this is someone else's thanks that he's taking. But he can't help it. As always, he was damned selfish. Like every other human out there. ]

[Somewhere between crying and trying to talk, Seto realizes Shin took his hand back. It's surreal. There's no warmth left in his hand that Seto remembered while he was growing up, clinging to that old man like he already knew they only had each other. It's cold and Seto grasps it a little tighter, as though trying to warm it. A wasted effort, more than likely, but he doesn't care.

Seto would do anything for him.]

You raised me and...took care of me. We read books and...looked at the stars and you taught me so many things. You let me...draw on the wall while you were reading and...let me sit beside you every night. We did so much together and sometimes...we did nothing together. We would just sit and not talk.

[ Reminiscing so fondly about his Grandpa to Shin makes him happy for some reason. Shin may not remember, but Seto can remember for the both of them. He has every reason to thank him.]

It's because of you that...I'm alive. That I can experience everything in the world and make friends. So I want to thank you for every single thing.

[Kinda hard to thank someone when you're crying so much though.]

Edited 2012-04-17 06:15 (UTC)

[ None of it is familiar to him at all - nothing Seto says, not the warmth of his hand. Gazing at Seto helplessly is really all he can do. Even if he were a more social creature, this sort of position would be an awkward one to be in, and Shin is clueless. The person he's talking about sounds like someone else - for all intents and purposes in his mind, it is someone else - and yet he can imagine it. His real self, in loneliness and despair, powerless to do anything about Glass Cage in a physical body crushed by it. It wasn't out of the question that something like this could happen. All he'd intended to do when he left for that observatory was to eke out a miserable little existence for a while and then die like the rest. But if he'd found a child...

How could any child he'd raised turn out like Seto? Wasn't he the most bitter monster of them all? Wasn't he aiming to kill the remaining humans? That was his goal. Perhaps it was different for his 'real self.' Maybe that one had retained some hope when he met this boy so early on. ]

... I'm sorry. I don't remember it.

[ but he lets Seto hold his hand still, clearly thinking deeply. ]

It's okay.

[While Seto said that, the reality of the situation is just starting to dawn on him. He is the only one with memories of their time together and he knows, without a doubt, it was Shin. He realizes that Grandpa is still dead and what remains is the him before they met.

Still, it doesn't hurt. Seto is glad to have any part of him still here. It's not better, but it's almost nice. The old man in his final days seemed so lost and sad. This was a chance to protect him from that. Shin might be a ghost, but that doesn't mean he didn't deserve a chance to live and be happy.

During this silence, his tears have subsided and he looks up at Shin with a smile.]

We're...still family. You're Shin and I love you a lot. Even if you don't remember, I still...want to make you happy here.

[ You're Shin and I love you a lot.

His eyes widen at that statement, staring at Seto like he grew a second head. Seto loved him?

Just for that? For something he didn't remember doing - something he hadn't done yet? It made no sense.

And yet he'd raised this boy. The real Shin, with his empathy. He'd known whatever feelings Seto had been feeling, accepted him and raised him anyway, and with these results. These had to be his honest feelings. If they weren't, he wouldn't have kept him around. He'd known him like this. Just like this...

Shin is quiet for a moment, eyes softening as he looks at the boy. Then, hesitating, he lifts up one ghostly hand before placing it on top of Seto's head. The life with Sai he couldn't have. The child he couldn't raise. Everything he'd missed seemed to be coming back now. ]

... I'm sure that he knew it. Thank you... Seto.

[This kind of affection was rare growing up. It was something that happened from time to time, only when he seemed to feel at his lowest and it would immediately cheer him up. Now isno exception. In fact, those words and the feeling of Grandpa's hand on his head makes him almost want to cry again. Thankfully for Shin, he can hold it back. He's too overwhelmed by how happy he is.

Shin's reaction is all he needs to feel comfortable releasing his hand and turning slightly. Within moments, he has both his arms wrapped around him, standing on his tiptoes as high as he can go. Yes, Shin. It's hug time and you will never escape.]

I'm so glad. Thank you, Shin.

[ He stiffens up at the contact, hands hovering a little awkwardly behind Seto. It wasn't that he hadn't expected this, but the situation was still so surreal - especially for him. It shouldn't be happening. If it were up to him, it wouldn't be. But Seto seemed convinced that Shin was Shin was Shin. And considering he was the one with the memories, it felt wrong to deny that he was right.

Hesitantly, he returns the embrace, just barely putting his arms around Seto. Ghostly hug for sure. ]

[It's enough for him. All he ever wanted was to have the chance to be with his grandpa and tell him all the things he never said while he was alive. Shin could probably tell that he's elated. So beyond happy his big head could float all the way into space.

While he was lonely most of the time living with grandpa, he was never unhappy. The old man took care of him and helped him. The best moments were when they were together, like this, though he wasn't affectionate and Seto could count on his fingers the number of times it happened.]

I'll still call you Shin. That's your name and that's...who you are now.

[He starts after a few seconds of silence, still holding onto him.]

But I will always love you like Grandpa and I'll protect you.

[ It still feels wrong to him. Whatever semblance of morality he had left, whatever was in the process of growing back, was quite determined on feeling guilty about this. However, it was hard to push Seto away when he was obviously so happy, even for Shin. He lets his hands rest a little awkwardly on Seto's shoulders, clearly uncertain on what he should do. It wasn't that he didn't like kids, if Seto could still be called one - back before Glass Cage, he'd been quite fond of them, actually. But it had been years and years since he'd touched anybody, or even wanted to, and vice versa. Until that night on the tower with Sai, he hadn't even had the faintest inkling of any sort of positive emotion. In a word... he was rusty. Emotionally.

And this is all a little overwhelming. That not one, but two people could say that they loved him, even now... If he looked up at Shin's face, he'd see him with a rare expression - one of vulnerability and caution and, just barely, gratitude. What can he even say to that? ]

... Thank you. [ he answers a little lamely. He wasn't old enough to be called Grandpa, anyway. Or he didn't feel like it. ]

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stop eating grass seto

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1/2

OHHHH MY GOODDDD DDDD DDD

HHHHHHHWWWWOARGH

RRRRRRRRRRRRUUUUUUUUUUUUUWWWWWWWWWWkaKK

WAKWAKWAKWAKWAKWAKWAKWAK

PACPAPCAPACAPCACACPAPC

FBSDBDBDBFBSFB

THUMPATHUNBKAPPf

HBLBIBLBIBLGBIB SETO

RUURUWROWARW SHIN

this is too precious i don't even know if I'm happy or sad

ALL MY SALAMI OH M YGODkF:LAKF:LAFKAFiei on the ground noo

/lies on the ground with your salami

be sure to treat it nicely

oh my god seto is so cute i'm going to throw up all my organs